Life Purpose- Your Soul Story

I talked a little bit about finding our life purpose. Though we discussed the bigger reason for our life here on this physical realm, which is to evolve the soul, what does that really mean? Ok, so we learn to love deeper, we use our gifts to contribute to the "collective", and blah, blah, blah, but on a more personal level, it still doesn't answer the remaining questions, "who am I?" "Where did I come from?" "Why don't I feel like I am from here?".  There are still so many unanswered questions, it like trying take a bunch of puzzle pieces and piecing them together in order to see the whole picture.

When I spoke about the soul as our own personal akashic records, what I mean is that our soul holds ALL the information about our own souls. Our souls have traveled throughout it's existence and each soul holds a story, your story. When we reenter the physical realm, we often "forget" our soul's memories and it seems like we start from scratch all over again. Throughout our journey in each lifetime, half of the journey is remembering. Yes, we often come for our own reasons and yes we are to expand upon the knowledge we have already gained, but what makes it so hard to do is not remembering our story to begin with. Our passions, our interests, the things that draw us to things are often the things that we have already experienced and trigger the memories of the soul. We often experience things such as deja'vu's or may have a knowing feeling without actually having a real understanding of what we know. We feel more connected to certain people, places or situations but we don't know why. We just know that it feels familiar or we recognize something but not really sure what it is about it that we connect with. So what does all of this mean? These moments are often memories trying to surface into the consciousness. These are the triggers the soul needs in order to remember who we are, not as human beings but as soul beings.

I think we all agree that the soul is infinite. It's spiritual or non-corporeal in nature, so if the soul is not physical, wouldn't that mean it is possible that it's creation would begin in a non-physical place? We often talk about our souls as being human, but what makes the soul human? First, you have to define, what makes a human...human? The only real thing that makes one entity human and another not is being housed in a physical body and being able to experience a type of life that revolves around a more physical state of being. But this state is temporary, and when our physical lives end, then we return back into a non-corporeal state. This is why alot of spiritual people repeat the saying " I'm not a human having a spiritual experience, I am a spiritual being having a human experience." So, where were we before we became corporeal? And were do we go afterwards? Most people believe we go back to a spiritual state and end up in some type of spiritual realm. We are taught that the spiritual realm only consists of two places, heaven and hell. But so many people seem to have so many different views on what these places are like, so if there were only one, wouldn't everyone have the same experience or memories of what these places are like? You would think they would but they don't, so that would mean there has to be more then just one heaven and one hell otherwise the experiences would be identical. This concept seems to be limited to particular religions,which often bound by theories,experiences and memories of one particular person, but even in these religions, there are souls that experience something very different. Each experience is different for each soul.

I worked for a time in Nursing and have been around dying people. I have seen some people who made peace with death long before they die and there are some that will fight to the bitter end. Some experience a bright light, other's see family and friends, some smell fresh baked breads, and other see shadows. Some see nothing but a bright light, some see beautiful mountains and green lush grass with rivers and streams, some see Jesus and some see something completely different. As a Medium, I have seen spirits in the shadows, see them burning in some hell dimension, some wandering in complete darkness and others just remain here. Some notice you, some do not. When people astral project, they see worlds and realms that others may not see, and other may have seen the same place. Edgar Cayce, one of the most famous Clairvoyants ever written about described doctors,master's and guru's from the future that didn't sound like they were here on this planet. When I was 12, I started playing a "game", not really a game, that the players were required to astral project to the 7 gates of hell (and I can attest that there were definitely more then 7) and to fight the demons before they ascended upon the earth and created the next apocalypse. What I saw was many different places. Some of the most beautiful places I have ever seen happened to be in hell! I not once saw any type of fire and brimestone. Instead, I saw beautiful crystal blue lakes (which you didn;t want to touch because the water was acid...eeeekkkk), beautiful forests. One realm was nothing but dense fog and you couldn't see anything at all! Is it imagination? The scratches and bruises I woke up with on a daily basis suggested otherwise! The point, is that all over the world and through out history,mankind has had visions of things that are beyond this realm. These experiences, these visions may have been some crazy story to the outsider, but to the person who experiences it, it's very real!  And so many other people believe in this because they have experienced similar things as well. There is an inherent knowing within that there is more to this life or world then just what we can physically see or experience because our soul experiences so much more.  We are not completely bound to this physical realm which, at it's basic level, we ALL know, which is why there are so many different experiences and so much belief, in at least to the fact that there is more out there. Even scientists are discovering this.

The point is that once we are able to shed some of the corporeal boundaries that the physical realm places upon us, we are able to accept that there is more then what we can see with our physical eyes which opens us up to the possibilities that other spiritual realms exist. And once we start discovering this side of our souls, then we are able to accept the information our souls have hidden within. It;s usually when we are seeking answers to the experiences we have that are not on the physical realm or can't be explained on a physical level, is when we start seeking the answers the soul holds within. The physical realm often blinds us from the truth that we are often seeking. Our minds have a difficult time accepting what it cannot understand logically because the conscious is programmed to make logical sense on a more physical level. Most people, however, are able to bypass this through the sub-conscious level, which is a temporary storage unit for anything that requires thoughts, to include memories. This "in-between" place doesn't look for logic in the physical realm, it just houses any type of information and allows you to process it however you choose. It's the medium that helps us access the information of the soul and helps us accept that information, especially memories.

Emotions also helps us access the memories of the soul. We could see something that would be considered fantasy but it stirs up an intense emotional reaction within. At the moment, it may not make sense, but often it's these emotions that will trigger memories or visions that may not seem real in the physical realm, but the experience is so intense, you know it to be true because you already know it. You've seen this before or you've done that before, though, in this lifetime, you know you didn't. It's these emotional triggers that push us to gain more information. Sometimes it becomes an obsession because you NEED to know, and though you don't know why at the moment, you just know it's important for you. This urgency starts leading you to start asking questions. What am I feeling? Why am I feeling this after seeing this? I know this, but how do I know this? This pain is so intense, and I KNOW this pain, but why, I've never had this happen before! For some, it's the extreme emotional responses that will make people run to the hills and maybe not want to know or understand more. But if your on a particular journey to find something specific, then this trigger is often the key to unlock the door to the information you are seeking, and if you avoid it, it will come up again.

The human experience is simply that, an experience. The corporeal experience is designed to help us gain a deeper understanding of what is already hidden within the soul, to discover and understand new things and to take what is in spirit and make it into a physical form. The physical realm is not designed to be eternally "set in stone". The universe is ever changing and so is the physical realm. It has to move and these physical changes help it move, helps the physical realm grow and also evolve. But it needs us to build it, to take what is in thought form and make it physical. God may have created the earth in 6 days, but it was corporeal beings that created the buildings, the beautiful structures, to up-keeping and maintenance of the physical world. The world is an eccletic physical showcase of the many different cultures that left the realm of spirit and entered into the realm of physical. The souls that arrived from the beginning of time until even now, each brought with them different ideas with them in order to "manifest" or create a reflection of what was already within. These ideas,just like on earth, were inspired by other souls. It's the taking of one idea, sharing it and then someone else either expanding upon the first idea,tweaking the original idea or using that idea to come up with something else  that is completely different. When you look at the history of mankind, many of the cultures and beliefs are similar, but some races of people brought with them completely different ideas and build very different creations. The Myans would be a good example of this. Do we often look at the Myans coming from the same heaven as Jesus? If they did, why are the concepts and ideas so different? This leads me to believe that there is more then only one spiritual realm, more then one society of souls, and more then one way souls have existed before the creation of the earth.

It's also this type of rational that allows my mind to accept the possibility that I'm not from the earth itself. That perhaps, my soul journey, our soul journey may go far beyond the limitlessness of earth, and one heaven and one hell. This possibility of traveling through the many different realms is no longer an over-active imagination but through being in a spiritual state of being, makes these memories very possibly true. It's this simple knowledge that our souls are not bound, but infinite, that allows us to accept the memories and knowledge that we have collected since the beginning of our journey of existence. The memories no longer seem so far fetched, because our minds are finally able to understand and accept the truth of those memories. And when the pieces start coming together, it all makes perfect sense. You realize that this knowledge isn't just reserved for guru's, but we are all destined to seek this knowledge. These our own personal records, a journal of our travels through the universe, not just of this world, and this journal not only allows us to see where we were, but shows us where we are now and where we need to go from here.

Acceptance of truth within you is your first step into understanding your soul's journey. Your soul holds the story of your existence,the journal of your travels, and the map that guides you to your next destination. If you can accept the truth the soul reveals to you, you will be able to answer the questions that brought you this far already. The journey of the soul is the journey of truth, your truth, your story. Some stories will come with a  happy ending, but it's through the trials that helps us learn and grow and it's often these memories that tend to surface. Be prepared to relive some of those memories, but as you begin to remember more, you will have a greater understanding of the importance of it. It will show you where you were and how you evolved into who you are now. As you begin to remember, you will also remember the reason you came here. You will begin to shed some light on some of your life themes, the things you are passionate about and greater understanding of....you! The most beautiful story that has ever been written in within you! 

What We Are

This was a response to another EC, but it seemed to help clarify some things. 

Not really sure.  All I know is that my first memory was when I was 5 and at my mother's church. That's when a male spirit came to me. There was a cemetery in the back of the church, though, looking hindsight, I'm beginning to think that  was the vision he was showing me of his funeral. Simply because my mother and cemetery's don't mix,lol. It was so natural to try and cross him over, but feeling everything he showed me, on top of the hellfire and brimestone sermon later that morning. Well, I don't think it opened me up to the higher spirit realm,with the knowledge of heaven and Angels, God,   I think it opened me up to the earthly and lower realms of the spirit realms. Not the place of light, but the place of shadows. That's what triggered the constant revolving door of lost  souls, shadows and demons. Shorty after that encounter, we had a plane crash behind our apartment complex. That night, my closet was filled with shadow people, they kept staring at me, like they were waiting for me. Scared the heck out of me. Then more shadows, and the fear. All this started me on my journey and I have been on this course since.
It makes sense though. I can give some messages from crossed over spirits, and though I often see, them, they are not as solid. I don't see them, feel them, or hear them as clearly. If they are earthbound or lost, I get it all and its sooo clear. It's always been like that. It's why I don't have much of a connection with crossed over spirits, because they are already in the light, they don't really need me, but the earthbound and especially the lost souls, they are void of light.  They literally live in their own private hell, a hell I wish to save them from, even since that day. Sorry, I know I'm rambling, but I think I'm realizing something right now There's times where I wish I could do readings, mediumship readings, for clients, but I don't for the very reason I stated above. Sometimes they will come across and I can get the message, but they don't come across as clear. I always knew it had to do with what I was connected to. I was a beacon, a light to those who had none, and my desire was to save them. I just figured that was my job, since I understood their shadows so well, I would always be a part of the shadow, and I don't think that will change. I used to run from it, and I times I still do, but I have also learned to find comfort in it. I know what keeps them there. I understand their fear of the light. I understand what it's like to want something, but not really sure if I'm ready or worthy enough to embrace the greater things meant for me I've lost the desire to help them, the urgency, it's like to long in the shadows, you become immune to it. Yet, they don't stop coming. They really like it when I open my circle, lot's of light. In  fact, I did a solitary ceremony with my husband to help him connect with his recently departed Aunt before she crossed over. After a time spend, she was ready to go, but the room also filled up with other lost souls who wanted to go as well. I closed it before I could let them go through because it wasn't protected and I didn't want to ruin a sacred moment for my husband. It's funny, I should have done it, because that night, I actually crossed them over in my dream,lol. There was alot of them! I don't think it's really not wanting to help them, it's the aftermath. I work really hard to keep things cleansed, but the rest of the "lower realms" seem to be my problem child. It's like a life long episode of Charmed and being attacked every week! It's the battle that has made me weary,yet they still keep coming. I've accepted that this is my "destined duty" but it'd definitely not as enchanting as Ghost Whisperer. When you live most of your life among the dead, you start to feel dead and year for the things that make you feel alive again. When you walk among the shadows for so long, it's so hard to keep the light shining and bright. Yet, here's the kicker, it's that light that chases away the shadows! Now that I have the time to embrace "my destiny", I'm not sure I have the will or strength to do it anymore. Always a paradox. But through all of this rambling, I always figured that if we were destined to do something, we would always have the passion, the fire, the thing inside that keeps us doing what we are doing. Maybe that's not the case. Maybe the abnormal becomes so normal that it becomes mundane. Like any job, I guess. I've been talking alot about this with my husband lately. "Embracing the calling", but I told him to expect all hell to break loose, more then what it has been. But it's funny, because, just as strongly as they have shown their side, so have the Angels intervened just as strong.

I think I lost my reason. There was a specific purpose in doing what I did and it was fulfilling, but living in this world, I seem to have lost the purpose of it all. I've always been like that, passion goes hand in hand with action which is ALWAYS stemmed by the purpose behind it. If I loose the purpose, it's hard for me to stay focused. I ask myself, "why?" " why am I doing this?". The answer is always the same " to help". But that answer doesn't seem to be enough. "Why do I want to help them?" It  used to be so they wouldn't have to suffer the pain. But now that I have healed the majority of my pain, it's difficult for me to have the desire to connect with theirs. I've disconnected without actually considering the consequences for that soul. I guess I figure that since people make their own choices anyway's, that they are going to do as they wish and it's a waste of time. But, there is a reason why there is this huge war in the spiritual realm. There is a reason why each sides fights so hard to preserve what is left or take what is left. The pendulum has shifted and it's not in the favor of the light. People,humans have become selfish, jaded, apathetic. The fight seems almost moot. Evolution will come one way or the other, but it's usually through these trials that define us. As individuals, we might have a chance, but as a collective whole, evolution is a slow and painful process. I don't understand the need for lightworker's. The collective seems to have chosen greed, lust, and pride over anything else. I can't help but to feel that as kids, we failed. The one time when so much spiritual energy filled this planet and the dark has taken control. 500 years ago wasn't the dark ages, we are in the dark ages now. It's heartbreaking watching the demise of this world. We fight for them, we grieve them, but as children, they don't see or understand what is happening. Nor do they seem to want to. The pain of all the others who came here to fight, we all grieve because I think we all know. We know what is in store. And when we leave, the darkness will only get darker. And maybe that is the purpose. The seeds we plant now, aren't for now, but for later. When people reach that point of darkness within, there is nothing left but to seek that light. Without that light, darkness will remain. Little glowing embers left behind used to guide the path of those who seek it. I think I'm beginning to see a clearer picture. Myself, as a gatekeeper, bring in energy here, release energy there, in hopes to evolve saplings to maturity one day. There was one thing left at the bottom of pandora's box, and that was hope. That is what we are.